When it comes down to it, a long distance relationship isn’t too different from a ‘standard’ relationship. Both require work, but being so far away from your partner does have a few unique challenges. These obstacles don’t mean it’s not a valid or feasible relationship, it just means you need to take the right steps to address them. So here are some long distance relationship ideas from the Juicebox sex and relationship app to help you and your partner be more intimate.
Since there is no regular physical aspect to a long distance relationship, this means that communication is even more vital. In a lot of ways, communication IS the relationship. When you live close enough to see each other, you learn about your partner naturally as you spend time together. Where as in a long distance relationship, you have to communicate the details they would otherwise pick up on.
Make sure you and your partner are able to have honest, open conversations about what is and isn’t working. It can take time to find the right balance of phone calls and texting, so make sure you’re giving feedback to create the best schedule for you both. It's also important not to have too much contact, you don't want your calls to be a chore. Varying your means of communication can help with this. If you just text all the time, it can start to feel stale. Mix in phone calls and video chats to have well-rounded contact. Even writing a letter would be a romantic twist!
If calls and chats aren’t enough and you start to feel lonely, try planning for the next time you’ll see each other. It will ease the uncertainty and give you something to look forward to. Planning events and activities to do together when you do meet is another way to keep the conversation positive and exciting. When you do meet up, try to make your visits substantial. If its been month since you've seen each other, a weekend probably won't be long enough to catch up. This is a matter of scheduling, but take as much time as you can together when you get it. Also, don't feel pressured to have big events planned. There's nothing wrong with just watching a show and enjoying each other's presence.
Make time for each other. Even if you’re both busy, try to schedule uninterrupted time together regularly. Make it part of your daily routine to check in, whether it be in the morning or after work to see how their day was. It's important to enjoy the little things- a goodnight text, or an encouragement if you know they have a hard day ahead. Find times when your schedules synch up. It may be hard to not see each other, but regular conversations on your lunch break or before bed can make it so their still a part of your daily life.
Try to do things together, like watching the same movie while either texting or on call. Create a two person book club, or find an online game you both like. With the internet there are plenty of things you can do together in real time. Just think of what you’d do if you were in person and try to simulate it the best you can. Face timing when you're out doing chores may not sound thrilling, but it can give you a bit of that domestic intimacy that you'd get from doing them together.
Even in a long distance relationship, sex and intimacy aren’t off the table. First of all, sex isn't the only form of intimacy. Gifts and regular compliments are great ways to show your love from afar. Learn about the five love languages and find out what makes your partner happy, or gets them in the mood. It goes back to communication; since you can't touch them, you need be able to have a conversation about what they like and what you both need to feel loved and fulfilled.
As for sex, there are options. Sexting or sending nudes throughout the day can be great foreplay- building up the tension until they can get home. From there, you can have a video call in which you watch each other masturbate, or have phone sex. If you're unfamiliar with phone sex, we have some tips for talking dirty without making it weird. There are also remote controlled sex toys available. These allow you to almost 'touch' your partner, even from a different continent.
Just like physical sex, its a skill you need to build with your partner. Find out what they need, and what they like. Make sure you are also aware of their boundaries. A long distance relationship still relies on trust and respect. If one of you isn't comfortable being on video, focus on dirty talking or texting.
Long distance relationships aren't doomed to fail, or intrinsically worse than other relationships, but if you’re in a long distance relationship for the first time, it can be difficult to adjust. For any concerns about your relationship, whether you’re in one or are about to be, try the Juicebox app for one on one advice from sex and dating experts. Coaches can offer support and help you figure out ways to keep the connection strong between you and your partner. While it may be hard to be so far away from your partner, you can still have an enriching and fulfilling relationship, as long as you’re willing to make it work.